Exploring My America

Hey all.
I haven't posted in a long time, but, now is the time!
I, and Brian, are considering entering into the Sears Exploring my America Challenge and we will need your help.
So.... start following this blog more.
OK thanks.

drunk white guy in need of ride

On Friday, Brian and I drove down to Florida to camp out for a night by the beach.

It's a pretty sweet life, I am not going to lie.

We had to wake up fairly early because it is a four and a half hour drive and we wanted plenty of beach time. We ended up leaving LaGrange around 6 AM and getting to Grayton Beach around 10:30. We went to lunch, got a camp site and spent the rest of our time on the beach playing in waves, drinking PBR and poking dead jelly fish in the sand.

Our original plans involved living it up at a local bar but by the time we got to the bar and had a beer in our hands we were tired and ready to head back to the camp site. This is when things got interesting.

We headed to the car and we see this man stumbling in the street. We saw him earlier inside the bar staggering from one chair to the next trying to text. At first we laughed at how ridiculous it was to see a thirty something year old in khakis, polo shirt and loafers acting so completely wasted, but then we saw his keys in his hands and got a little worried. No way this guy could drive.
So we pulled up beside him and asked if he was OK. He said he was, but he couldn't find his car.
We offered to give him a ride home and he accepted.
Meanwhile, on the ride home we had to do out best to keep him from going comatose, meanwhile he continuously went back and forth from trying to hold my hand and putting his hand on Brian's thigh.

Eventually we got him home. Finally. We pulled into his drive and watched him open his gate and make his way to the front door. Then we lost sight of him.
He fell. Face first into his garden bed.
Brian had to pull him up and we dragged him to his door and let him in.

We aren't really positive that it was his house because the door was open and we didn't need to use the key he provided. We figure he knew the house at least so if it wasn't his he at least knows the person who lives there.

Nothing funnier then a drunk preppy white man getting helped into his house by sober kids 10 years younger then him. Weren't we the ones who should have been smashed?

friendship bracelets

I have recently acquired friendship bracelet making materials. If you would like a friendship bracelet and would like it to be certain colors let me know.

I may have a lot of time on my hand and I may be making a lot of friendship bracelets to fill that time (quite possibly more bracelets than friends...)

necessities

So, I made such a production about my electric toothbrush that my roommate bought me one.
Which pretty much secures the belief that I was acting immature.

What makes it worse is my mom is sending me down another electric toothbrush as well.

Which means I will have three fully functioning and one broken electric toothbrush in my possession.

Completely necessary.

new cell phone

fyi, I got a new cell phone.
It's the same number.
If you haven't heard from me yet it's because I don't have your number so please text/call me and give your number.

thanks

electronic toothbrush : (

I was given an electronic toothbrush for Christmas. It wasn't the particular model I requested but it sufficed. I soon became quite attached to my electronic toothbrush due to its superior brushing capabilities in comparison to manual toothbrushes. I was pretty much hooked and completely smitten with my new toothbrush. My teeth felt dentist clean after every brushing.
I kid you not, this isn't a commercial for electric toothbrushes, I just really liked mine.
In the past when I used a manual toothbrush, I found myself brushing multiple times in one sitting because I just didn't feel satisfied with my level of clean. With my new toothbrush I only had to brush once after every meal. I was on cloud nine.
Then one day, it stopped working properly. In the middle of the night I would hear it going off on it's own with out me pressing start. It would refuse to start when I pressed "on" and would be on a delay. I was worried. Things didn't look good.
Then things just stopped. The electric portion of my toothbrush no longer worked. Yes, I could still use it as a manual toothbrush but why bother?
I was devastated. No amount of mouthwash/floss/sugar free mint gum could come close to getting my mouth to feel as clean as it did when my brush was working.
I turned to my mother for help.

Mom, please send me the receipt for the electric toothbrush you bought me for Christmas. It has only been two months and it has already stopped working.

Oh, that sux. I threw it out.

I am very passionate about my oral hygiene and I am a bit peeved. Why should I have to buy myself a new electric toothbrush costing $80 because my mother threw out the receipt. Am I spoiled? Maybe. Do I care? No. I want a replacement toothbrush. So, I explained to my mother that I was feeling rather jaded that she threw out the receipt for an expensive gift and now the gift receiver has to replace the failed merchandise. It's just not fair.
So I get an e-mail saying that a replacement brush had been purchased and sent in the mail.

Now I am happy again; blissful teeth cleaning is only days away.

But then, the toothbrush comes in. This is not the same toothbrush. This is a crappy $8 version of an electric toothbrush that I am going to have to replace the batteries of constantly and is not compatible with the replacement heads that I already have.

I am peeved again.

pancakes

I don't know how it happened, but somehow I lead everyone down here to believe that I have absolutely zero cooking skills.
Maybe it's because I only bring the beverage or some frozen food that requires reheating to all our potluck dinners. Maybe it was the one time I hosted the dinner and just bought a pre-made lasagna. Maybe it was the time I burnt my hand getting sweet potato fries out of the oven. I don't know. I guess I never fought the assumption.

Yes, I usually just let Brian do the cooking. He likes it so why not. I am not so attached to cooking. I can do it (really, I can) I just don't get all hot and bothered about it.
But now I am in too deep. It is commonly assumed that I lack cooking skills.

Last night I hosted a breakfast themed dinner. Brian did the eggs, I did the pancakes.
All the piteous chuckles I received from my failed attempts to make shamrock shaped pancakes were too much! I don't think there is any correlation to cooking ability and ability to make perfect shamrocks.

"O-ho-ho Adrienne, maybe you should just try making regular pancakes. That is more align with your skill set ::chuckle chuckle::"
-not an actual quote but it certainly sums up the vibes.

A rose by any other name

At lunch yesterday I was standing in line with one of Mariam's friends. We were exchanging pleasantries when she turns to me and says, "I'm sorry, I know we see each other all the time and say hi but what is your name again?"
For once I felt socially superior because I knew her name was Rose and she didn't know my name was Adrienne. So, I told her my name and then we went to a table and sat down to eat our lunch.

On the LaGrange College website they feature three students every month on the main page. This month one of those students was Rose so I decided to tell her that I saw her being featured on the web site.

This is where it got awkward.

She says, "That's not me, that's Rose."
I think, "If you're not Rose who are you?" but of course, at this point she already asked me for my name and I acted like i knew her name so it would be too awkward for me to ask now so I just try to play it off commenting on how similar they both look and that I should have looked at the feature closer...
For the rest of lunch she kept up with saying my name.
Adrienn, what do you feel about this? Adrienne, what did you do this weekend? etc. etc.

I on the other hand awkwardly refrained from using names.

communication update

Because I lost my phone, I am reinstating Facebook as a valid form of communication until I get a new phone.

every once in awhile.

sometimes, I wake up and everything is different or everything is too much the same- I don't really know which.

all I know is I need something different, I need something more.
I don't know if it's hormones or hangovers or something in me that was just born to run but I can't help wanting to go.

so I bite my tongue and I fight my urges and I tell myself: nothing is permanent, nothing is forever. you can leave when its all done. you're not trapped, you're not missing out, you're only 24; there's still time.

and the feeling passes and I keep going and nothing is wrong and nothing is bad so I'm OK.

Ballers

There was a point in my life where I was a tenacious basketball player. And I don't say that to toot my own horn as much as I say that to point out the stark contrast in the Adrienne of yesteryear and the Adrienne of today. The Adrienne of today no longer has confidence in her hands when it comes to shooting a basketball. Her hands turn to butter and her arms turn to putty and the ball slips out at strange angles never quite in range of the hoop.
Fortunately for the Adrienne of today, lacrosse has maintained her defensive skills so that the Adrienne of today still enjoys a good game of ball as long as it is known that she is there for the love of defense, not for the love of shooting.

And it was on this notion that I agreed to play intramural basketball with some of the other coaches. When I found out that four of my fellow players had college basketball experience I felt confident that I could solely play defense and leave the offensive end up to the more experienced players.

This theory was working perfectly. We had played two games thus far and were blowing the other teams out of the water- until tonight.
Our four college basketball players couldn't come to the game. It was up to the remaining 5 of us to come together and make it happen.
First half we were down 22-14. As I had mentioned, my shot is not what it once was and I refrained from asking for the ball. I needed to step up. I needed to man up and shoot.

I tried. I missed. I tried again, I air balled. I tried again, I bricked. I tried again, I air balled. I tried again and a voice came from the crowd "If you can't shoot get off the court!"

I'm sorry sir, I do not have that luxury. All our subs had other commitments and its just the five of us and I can't shoot.

I still needed to shoot but now it was clear that my lack of confidence wasn't for reasons inside my head, but rather it was quite obvious to everyone that I sucked.
What's a girl to do? My team needed me but my ego needed me more.
So I turned it into a joke. I pretended I didn't care, I pretended that my shooting exploits were part of a grand comical scheme to make the audience laugh.
Did I miss again? Aren't I a hoot... Let's give a round of applause to the girl who doesn't care.

but I do care. So I kinda think I need to work on that...

oop!

So this kid in my dorm and I have opposite schedules and when I come back into the dorm he is always just leaving.
And it's weird because I will literally be pulling the door open and he is pushing the door open and the doors only have a small window so I never see it coming but the door opens much faster and then BAM, there is a person right there.

All I can do as a reaction is say "oop!" in a slightly high toned voice and its honestly happened so many times that now I feel really, really stupid saying "oop" and feel the need to apologize every time.

Whatever I am just the weird grad student that lives with the girl who speaks spanish, I'm not trying to impress these people.

New Poll

I added a new poll to the right. Feel free to vote. I already did.

Valentines Day

In the spirit of valentines day I am going to share with you the story of my first kiss with Brian.

Please note that my reference to Valentines day in no way implies that I actually support Valentines Day or even remotely care for Valentines day because on both counts that is not true.

Brian and I had been hanging out for some time by this point and were cuddling quite a bit but no kisses had been attempted and I was still unsure if I really wanted to head down that road.
We were at Brian's house and were cozied up on the couch watching t.v. or maybe a movie, who keeps track. I decided I had enough of prancing around the issue and based on our excessive cuddling I determined that if I went for a kiss there was a high chance for kiss reciprocation.
Brian was sitting in an upright position and I was nestled somewhat under his arm/in front of him/on top of his lap (how does one describe a cuddle position?). Anyways, I decided that now was the time and I tilted my head up and back and went for the kiss. In true kissing fashion my eyes were closed. In true Adrienne fashion I proceeded to make a fool out of myself and kiss his beard instead of his lips and what awkward moment isn't complete with out calling yourself out and explaining why you are awkward. So there I was, positioned in some awkward way, somewhat on Brian, explaining that I meant to kiss his lips and not his beard.

Obviously he was able to look past my retardation/may possibly be retarded himself and our kissing since the first incident is typically much more on target (though I do still miss and hit the beard from time to time).

hopeless jobless

I think I should change the name of this blog to Adrienne's Life is a Fail.

Not only will it encompass my inability to act normal in social situations, but it will also brush upon my experiences at the dentist and my experiences getting rejected from a cashier position at Wal-Mart (not because of the interview).

Turns out my life is a joke.

The dentist

Though not at all related to my ability to make friends, I thought I would share the story of my visit to the dentist today because I was completely floored by what happened.

Now, I don't mean to psych you up for something awesome because I assure you its actually completely utterly un-awesome.

So there I am at the dentist. I went less than year ago back home and was told I had two cavities. They said they weren't nothing and to keep up my brushing and flossing and that he would check in on them next time to see if they needed to be filled. I guess I went with his logic but in retrospect he should have just filled them even if they were small.

Anyways, so the year progresses and I am fairly obsessed with my dental hygiene.

Then comes today. I get to this new place and they do full x-rays of my teeth. I tell them about the two cavities I had prior and they come back with me with a different number. They tell me I have 10 cavities.

10 cavities.

How does one, who brushes so frequently, get 8 cavities in less than a year? I understand I eat a lot of candy, but I have seriously cut down on my sugar intake this past year and have certainly up-ed my over dental care. I didn't even know it was possible to get that many cavities in such a short amount of time. It just seems out of this world that I would be able to get that many cavities over a period of time where I was eating less sugar and using more fluoride enriched products.

In other news, I still need a job, even more so now because I for sure can't afford this shit.

JoAnns on my mind

I keep having these really vivid dreams that I am still working at JoAnn Fabrics. Sometimes I am working at the one at home, and other times they have just opened a new one down here in LaGrange and they come find me because they want me to work there.

True story, I need a job.

Roommate

Mariam got back in to LaGrange last night.

It's nice to have her around so there is someone to go to lunch with and someone to complain to and other various pro's to having a roommate.

But I do miss being able to leave the door open when I used the restroom.

JC Penney

I am a little put off by JC Penney right now.

I went there yesterday because I am in need of a job and there was a posting on-line saying the one in LaGrange was hiring.
I'm not going to lie, I felt like I was a shoe in for the job. With eight years of retail experience under my belt and flawless bull-shitting capabilities I felt I was a perfect fit.
So, I get there and inquire about the positions and they direct me to there service kiosk where I am subjected to a 40 minute, ridiculously long application process.
Despite it's extreme length and the idiocy of the questions I felt like I was nailing it.

There I am, 40 minutes deep in the process and just about complete and I am asked to answer some questions about the job. I answer about 20 questions and this screen pops up and tells me, the perfect applicant for this position, that based on the answers to my questions, I am not what JC Penney is looking for at this time.

I am fairly offended at this point in time. After how long I spent filling out this application to have a computer tell me I don't qualify. I didn't even get to talk to a person and charm them over with my suave. And what really gets me is I'm not allowed to apply for another job at JC Penney for 180 days. For real?

When did getting a shitty job become so serious?

uncomfortable possibilities

Brian's ex-girlfriends birthday is this weekend and I know this because yesterday, Brian says to me, "My friend, actually my ex-girlfriend, is celebrating her birthday this weekend and going to this show in Atlanta. She invited me to go- and you, if you want to come, do you want to go?"
So naturally, due to my constant goal to seem nonchalant and cool I say, "Ya, sounds like fun, lets go." Where in actuality, my mind is saying, "What? Go to an ex girlfriends birthday and hang out with all of said ex-girlfriends friends? Ya right, fuck that shit. If I want to feel uncomfortable for a night I can arrange to do that right here in LaGrange, no need to travel an hour to accomplish that."

So, um, ya. I know it really don't matter (as far as being a grown up is concerned) but its awkward enough to be around people you don't know, even more awkward to be around people you don't know and the only reason why your around them is because the guy your dating used to be in a serious relationship with one of them.

Am I wrong to think this would be really awkward or should I just bite the bullet, grow up and go?

Addresses

So I made my plea on facebook, and yes many of you responded but many of you didn't. So, to all you bitches and hoes who didn't send me their address this is your last chance, if I don't get an address you surely wont get any mail from me- and I am strongly considering changing exclusively to written letters and the like instead of using facebook to keep in touch.

Just saying, you want mail (everyone likes getting mail) give me your address.

Dead Phone

I don't know what happened but my phone broke.
So, I am using my phone yesterday and the screen is white. It's a flip phone so the front screen seems to work intermittently but overall, if I press any buttons or open it, everything goes white.
This means I cannot see texts, I cannot send text and unless I have a number memorized I cannot make calls. As an avid texter, I am a bit annoyed.

So prior to the phone dieing, Brian had sent me a text asking to meet me for lunch. In the middle of texting him back, the screen went white and I had to type blindly, having complete faith in my fingers and my t9-word.
He texts me back but I can't read the text.
Fortunately, a few weeks ago Brian and I had discussed our phone numbers and came up with a way to remember his in the event that we didn't have our cell phones. They way he told me to remember his was because the last 4 digits were 2428, because I am 24 and he is almost 28.
So I decided to call him and let him know the situation.
I dialed up the number from my office phone since I wasn't sure if my phone was working at all. I didn't expect him to pick up because he was at work so I wasn't surprised when it went to voicemail. He has an automated voicemail that is just a women's voice saying you have reached this number. For a brief moment I worried that I had dialed the wrong number, but I figured, what were the odds that someone would have a similar number and the same automated voicemail. So I left a message explaining that my phone didn't seem to be receiving texts and to call me at the office.
About an hour passed and I hadn't heard form him. It was just about lunch time so I decided to call again, this time on my cell phone, thinking that maybe he ignored the first call since it was from an unknown number. Once again it went to voicemail and once again I left an elaborate message about how many phone isn't receiving texts but apparently I can receive calls and if he still wanted to go to lunch he should call me back.
Well, I continue with my days work and go to Julies office for a little while to chat. An hour goes by and I decide to randomly check my voice mail since I can't see if anyone has called but perhaps Brian has, and he did. So I hit the proper keys on the phone to return the call. This is when I find out that Brian's number ends with 2824, not 2428...

Sorry 2428 for all the calls that don't make sense...

Chocolate?

Like many people, I have decided to use the New Year as a starting point for a becoming a healthier Adrienne.

The catch, of course, is all that left over holiday candy. Especially the giant stocking chock full of Hershey Kisses. To the say the least my attempts to avoid sugar and other fatty goods has been falling short of healthy.

At first, I was grateful that my mother had put some rather sketchy candies into my stocking. I kind of figured that I wouldn't eat the giant chocolate Santa labeled "chocolate flavored" but for what ever reason I held on to it. Maybe someone else would want it....

Well here we are, almost a month from Christmas and the Hershey Kisses are gone but my chocolate cravings persist, only strengthened by my lack of other junk food eating.
Though I have reservations about eating a supposed chocolate bar that in small letters under the words: Solid Milk Chocolate it reads "flavored" almost like its an after thought or even worse, something they don't want you to notice... but a girls got to attend to her cravings, so, here goes...

Library Awkwardness

You know when you go to the library to return a book there is usually a designated section at the counter for book returns? It may be a slot in the counter top or it may just be a box labeled "returns" but regardless, it is always a noticeable area. Well, the LaGrange College library does not have such a place so when I went to return my book the other day I was a little confused as to where I should put it. So, my options were to ask the women at the desk or, as I chose to do, simply renew the book for another month until I figure out where to return it.

So I broke down and brought up the boyfriend/girlfriend concept with Brian, so all you bitches who be nagging me about our status can opt to refer to us as boyfriend/girlfriend if you so choose.

Just going for a jog

So I slept over Brian's last night and woke up with no time to spare. I had to book it back to the dorm and change quickly and get my butt to work.
As I was pulling into the dorm parking lot I saw Mark. I waved but I don't think he saw me. I ended up parking a couple spaces away from where he was standing so I got out of the car and began to walk over to him to say hello when I hear him call out to a mother son duo, "are you here for football recruiting?" I decided that going up to him dressed like a slob as he is about to introduce recruits to LaGrange was probably not the best idea so I b-line it for my dorm.
In my haste, I miscalculated the step from the parking lot onto the grass and I face planted in the Georgia clay. Fortunately, with my cat like reflexes I was back on my feet in a nanosecond. Feeling flustered and unsure if Mark or anyone around me had just saw that, I decided to turn it into a little jog like move- because everyone likes to do one push up before they jog.

A good start to the New Year

I have been delighted to find the New Year to be full of people who agree with me on some very important issues. One being my Fart Particle Theory and the other being my Squatter Theory.

For those who are unaware of my Fart Particle Theory, let me fill you in.

The argument that the FP Theory presents is that in order for your nose to recognize a scent it must come in contact with particles. A simple illustration of this would be smoke. You may not be able to visibly perceive smoke, but smoke is detected by your nose once enough particles are present in the air. This same concept applies to farts.
The most controversial aspect of this theory is the essence of the FP's. According to this theory, those fart particles are in fact pieces of feces (as logic would induce). This meaning, that as you smell a fart, you are actually inhaling feces (albeit small particles, but none the less...).
Obviously this is disgusting but despite my intensive research many people are still non-believers and even worse, don't mind smelling farts.

Fortunately, not even an hour after the clock struck 12 and it was officially the New Year, I had the opportunity to explain my FP Theory to both Brian and his friend Don and guess what? Total agreement. Of course, these are logical people.

My next theory is on squatters. There was much discussion on squatters a few years back and my opinion was of course that they were disgusting slobs who were destroying modern society. Yet again, my opinion was met with opposition.

I'll out line my Squatters Theory as well.

The Squatter Theory basically refers to women who choose to hover over public toilets opposed to sitting down. The idea is that public toilets are too dirty and therefor one's baby soft buttocks can not handle the act of sitting on the porcelain throne. The problem with this idea is that women who squat, without exception, also spray. Their urine becomes sprinkled all across the seat creating in fact- a dirty toilet. The thing is, these "squatters" are the ones making the toilet such a mess. If everyone just chose to sit, there wouldn't be urine all over the fucking bathroom, it would just go into the bowl and be flushed away. Squatters are creating unsanitary environments for all nonconformist.

I have brought this up many a time without meeting many people who agree yet not even two days into the New Year, I bring my theory up to this girl at a bar and wouldn't you know, I found a person who agrees.

Now I don't know if its 2011 or maybe it's just the South, but I am refreshed to find so many logical people.