every once in awhile.

sometimes, I wake up and everything is different or everything is too much the same- I don't really know which.

all I know is I need something different, I need something more.
I don't know if it's hormones or hangovers or something in me that was just born to run but I can't help wanting to go.

so I bite my tongue and I fight my urges and I tell myself: nothing is permanent, nothing is forever. you can leave when its all done. you're not trapped, you're not missing out, you're only 24; there's still time.

and the feeling passes and I keep going and nothing is wrong and nothing is bad so I'm OK.